Rule 17b: No conjugal visits for the sake of science.

I love my life. I feel blessed with all the opportunities that have been put in front of me. I'm a great person, a grad student, and I have got a pretty kickass internship with the Illinois Department of Transportation that pays my grad tuition. Basically, that leaves me very few people to be jealous of. Now let's be honest; everybody's got one person who fits that bill, but I've got two. I'm normally jealous of really old people who win more money in the lottery than they have time to spend. But right now, and probably until I win this contest, I will be jealous of the person who gets to live here:


If you're a Chicagoan, you've probably heard about the Museum of Science and Industry's Month at the Museum promotion. Basically, the museum received 1500 applications from people vying to be the one person who gets the awesome job of actually living and blogging in the museum for an entire month. After hours, they can choose to sleep in this bedroom, or they can take their bedspread and pillow to any exhibit in the museum. It's like The Terminal, but way cooler.

In addition to living and blogging in the museum for the month, the winner becomes a full employee of the museum, which means they get to work as tour guides, conduct science experiment demos, and just about any other fun task they wish they could do. To sweeten the pot, not only do they get a bunch of tech stuff to help them make their blogs awesome (assumed to at least be a laptop, video camera, and digital camera), but they also get to keep it all, along with lifetime membership to the museum and a check for $10,000. For a month's worth of work. That's like being given a six figure job for a month. By now, you're probably pretty jealous.

I wanted to apply, and I probably should have. But I knew that my new internship wouldn't allow me to take off work (and school, for that matter) for a full month. Like I said at the top, my tuition is paid for; grad school ain't cheap, people. That risk wasn't worth the reward when I rationalized everything, but honestly, could it have been?

That answer is yes, especially for someone like me. I LOVE the Museum of Science and Industry, so much so that I'm buying a museum membership with my next paycheck ($80 gets me unlimited admission with a guest for an entire year). It is, in my opinion, the best museum in the country by far; what other museum boasted Harry Potter, Jim Henson's Muppets, AND Smart Home exhibits? Come on, tell me. I'll watch the clock.

My point is that this is one of those instances where following my dream may not have been rational, but would have made for one incredible story. Besides, I should have at least applied; there was no guarantee that I'd even get it.

Of course, there are minor downsides. Other than a few outside appearances, and barring a major museume accident/disaster, the winner is confined to the museum for the entire month. No leaving to shop in Michigan Avenue. No going to the Bulls game. No outside food (although I'm sure I could get around it and have Gino's East deliver a pizza).

In addition, the winner can't have overnight guests, which I guess does make sense. You don't want to oversleep one morning and have impressionable little 6 year old Johnny catch you in your glass bedroom in bed (possibly birthday suited up) with your significant other. No conjugal visits for the sake of science. But that also cuts out the possibility of a museum overnight party with your friends. If I could play cards and get plastered with my friends inside a life size fuselage hanging from the museum's ceiling, I probably would.

These were the "parameters" that stuck out the most, and even they're minor. All I have to say is that I'm awaiting the 2012 competition; I'll be fresh out of grad school and looking for a new job! Get ready!